CONFLICT RESOLUTION
(excerpts from posts)
(If you want to retell any of the stories listed below, be sure to obtain permission from the copyright holder if the material is not in the public domain)

Query: I just received a call from a school literacy coach. They want me to come in and share stories for the entire school during Conflict Resolution Week. The age range will be from Kindergarten (age 5) to Grade Four (age 9). These are some of the stories I thought of off the top of my head, but they are mostly suitable for the older children.
The Cracked Pot
The War Between the Sandpiper and the Whales
Old Joe and the Carpenter
The Argument Between the Sun and the Wind
The Gift of Insults
The Wolves Within
The Mask
Strength
The Tigers Whisker

1) How about The Red and Blue Coat (realizing there can be more than one valid point of view), and A Blind Man Catches the Bird (Being humble enough to right our mistakes)?

2) Another story you might want to talk a look at is found on Aaron Shepard's site.
Click here: GOS #20 ~ More Than a Match
http://www.aaronshep.com/storytelling/GOS20.html
I just thought of another that might work as well, Dan Keding's tale, The Tear. It is truly a beautiful story of a young boy who befriends a dragon.

3) Doing a bit of research on the conflict resolution subject tonight and found this on the International Storytelling Site. I thought it might be of use to many of you.
Click here: Storytelling For Peace: Selected stories for peace and conflict resolution
http://www.storytellingcenter.com/resources/articles/neile3.htm
I am also going to take a look at the two new wonderful books by our own Allison Cox, The Healing Heart for Communities and The Healing Heart for Families. I bet there are treasures between the pages on this subject as well.

4) There's a picture book called Dragon Soup by Arlene Williams that I like. It was published by H. J. Kramer, Inc. in 1996. A young woman in danger of having to marry the merchant from the village, who is demanding her as his bride if her father can't pay the money owed him in two weeks, resolves to visit the Cloud Dragons den and steal their treasure. When she arrives they are sleeping. She hides and decides just one of the giant pearls the blue green dragon is wearing would be all she needs. When she's sure he's sleeping she gnaws on the string of pearls and takes one. The dragon awakes and captures her, walking his brother in the process.

The brother says they'll have dragon soup for lunch. The girl is certain she'll be in the soup, but the two dragon brothers have been feuding for months about who makes the best soup. They ask her to choose, both of them offering her both rewards and threats. The girl tastes both soups and can't choose. Then she has an idea. After asking the dragons if they wouldn't like to taste a soup that is even better, she mixes some from each pot into a cup and declares it the best soup she's ever eaten. The dragons like it, too! She is given a pearl, and the winged dragon takes her for a ride so she can see beyond the mountains before he takes her home.

5) Here's the bibliography that was prepared for a series of events examining storytelling and conflict resolution held at Dominican College in San Rafael, California in 2003. All materials listed below relate in some way to conflict resolution..
BIBLIOGRAPHY OF STORIES AND OTHER SOURCES HELPFUL FOR DEALING WITH CONFLICT RESOLUTION IN THE CLASSROOM

CONTACT DIRECTLY:
Colorado School Mediation Project
2885 Aurora Avenue, Suite 13
Boulder, CO 80303
303-444-7671
http://www.csmp.org
RESOURCES AVAILABLE FROM CSMP:
CONFLICT RESOLUTION
Productive Conflict Resolution: Curriculum and Teacher's Guide
Conflict Resolution Posters
Handouts for parents
Integrating Conflict Resolution Into the Curriculum
Study Circle and Discussion Guide
PEER MEDIATION
Student Mediation Training Manual
Coordinator's Mediation Training Manual
Role Plays forMmediation Training
Peer Mediation in Action - Video package
"The School Mediator's Field Guide" - Cohen
VIOLENCE PREVENTION / RESTORATIVE JUSTICE
Using Stories to Prevent Violence and Promote Cooperation
Healing Wounds with Words
Making Things Right - Video and guidebook
Alternatives to Violence - Video package
RESEARCH
Comprehensive Peer Mediation Evaluation Report
National Curriculum Integration Project
Peer Mediation in Schools - Expectations and Evaluations
Does It Work? - CREnet
OTHER SOURCES:
Alpers, Anthony. Legends of the South Seas. New York: Thomas Y.
Crowell, 1970. Ashabranner, Brent and Russell Davis. The Lion's Whisker: Tales of High Africa. Boston: Little, Brown, 1959.
Atencio, Paulette. Cuentos From My Childhood: Legends and Folktales of Northern New Mexico. Santa Fe: NM: Museum of New Mexico Press, 1991. A charming collection of folktales, most of which the author learned from her mother, who in turn learned them from her godmother.
Aung, Maung Htin and Helen G. Trager. A Kingdom for a Drop of Honey and Other Burmese Folktales. New York: Parents' Magazine Press, 1969.
_____________. Burmese Folk Tales. New Delhi: Oxford University Press, 1948.
Bartos-Hoppner, Barbara. The Pied Piper of Hamelin. New York: J.B. Lippincott, 1985.
Boas, Franz (ed.) Kathlamet Texts. Smithsonian Institution, Bureau of American
Ethnology, Bulletin 26. Washington, D.C.: Government Printing Office, 1901.
Brendtro, Larry, Martin Brokenleg and S. VanBockern. Reclaiming Youth At Risk: Our Hope for the Future. Bloomington, IN: National Educational Service, 1990.
Brockett, Eleanor. Burmese and Thai Fairy Tales. Chicago: Follett, 1965.
Brody, Ed, Goldspinner, Jay, et. al. Spinning Tales, Weaving Hope: Stories of Peace, Justice and the Environment. Philadelphia, PA: New Society Publishers, 1992. An excellent resource for teachers, this publication features multicultural stories, detailed activity guides and an extensive bibliography of tellable tales.
Browning, Robesrt. The Pied Piper of Hamelin. New York: Harry N. Abrams, Inc., 1999.
Bush, Robert A. Baruch and Joseph P. Folger. The Promise of Mediation: Responding to Conflict Through Empowerment and Recognition. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-Bass Publishers, 1994.
Carlsson-Paige, Nancy and Diane E. Levin. Helping Young Children Understand Peace, War, and the Nuclear Threat. Washington, D.C.: National Association for the Education of Young Children, 1985.
Cathron, Jean. The Magie Calabash. New York: David McKay, 1954.
Chang, Isabelle. Tales from Old China. New York: Random, 1948.
Charney, Ruth Sidney. Teaching Children to Care: Management in the Responsive Classroom. Greenfield, MA: Northeast Foundation for Children, 1991.
Cole, Joanna,. Best-Loved Folktales of the World. New York, NY: Anchor Books, Doubleday, 1982. A collection of 200 stories from throughout the world, arranged by geographical areas.
Collins, Rives and Cooper, Pamela J.: The Power of Story: Teaching Through Storytelling. Scottsdale, AZ: Gorsuch Scarisbrick, 1997. This book provides numerous interviews with storytellers as well as imaginative activities that can be used with stories to build creative and academic skills in students.
Coomaraswamy, Ananda K. and Sister Nivedita. Myths of the Hindus & Buddhists. New York: Dover, 1967.
Courlander, Harold. The Tiger's Whisker. New York: Harcourt, Brace and World, 1957.
Crawford, Donna K., Richard J. Bodine and Robert G. Hoglund. The School for Quality Learning: Managing the School and the Classroom the Deming Way. Champaign, IL: Research Press, 1993.
Creeden, Sharon. Fair is Fair: World Folktales of Justice. The first collection of its kind, this book contains thirty world folktales of justice about wise judges, clever lawyers, and deceitful tricksters, from places as diverse as ancient Greece, Morocco, Germany, China, and Ireland. Some date back to pre-biblical days while others come from the American colonies. Each of these folktales sheds light on how our predecessors from various cultures dealt with criminal behavior, and Creeden follows most of them with commentary on how the same legal issues are handled by contemporary American law. Juxtaposing the wisdom of ancient cultures with the dilemmas of our modern legal system, this fascinating collection makes legal issues accessible and folktales relevant to our modern lives. American Folklore SocietyAesop Award winner; Storytelling World Honor, Storytelling Anthology; Storytelling World Honor. August House Publishers, August House Publishers, Inc., P.O. Box 3223, Little Rock, AR 72203-3223, By Phone (501) 372-5450; or Fax (501) 372-5579. ISBN 0-87483-477-5.
Crum, Thomas F., The Magic of Conflict. New York: Simon & Schuster, 1987. The author describes the principles of Aiki, a stress-reduction and conflict resolution strategy based upon the Japanese martial art and mind-body discipline of Aikido. The book is illustrated with stories of real-life experiences as well as a number of traditional tales.
Davar, Ashok. The Wheel of King Asoka. Chicago: Follett, 1977. True story of this Indian ruler who abandoned war for peace. Pillars inscribed with his philosophy still stand throughout India.
Diamond, Donna. The Pied Piper of Hamelin. New York: Holiday House, 1981.
Drew, Naomi. Learning the Skills of Peacemaking: An Activity Guide for Elementary- Age Children on Communication, Cooperating, Resolving Conflict. Rolling Hills Estates, CA: Jalmar Press, 1987. (Write to: 145 Hitching Post Drive, Building 2, Rolling Hills Estates, CA 90274).
Druon, Maurice. Tistou of the Green Thumbs. New York: Charles Scribner's Sons, 1958. Plants grow wherever Tistou places his hands. He places them on his father's armaments factory.
Durrell, Ann and Marilyn Sachs (eds.) The Big Book of Peace. NY: Dutton, 1990.
Exley, Richard and Helen Exley. My World Peace: Thoughts and Illustrations from the Children of all Nations. Lincolnwood, Ill.: Passport Books, 1985. Letters and thoughts from children around the world.
Faber, Adele and Elaine Mazlish. How to Talk So Kids Will Learn. New York: Avon Books, 1995.
Feldman, Christina and Kornfield, Jack. Stories of the Spirit, Stories of the Heart: Parables of the Spiritual Path from Around the World. New York: HarperCollins, 1991. A collection of beautifully told tales that illuminate such themes as love, faith, courage, compassion, wisdom and conflict resolution.
Finegan, Ruth. Limba Stories and Storytelling. Oxford: Clarendon, 1967.
Fisher, Roger and William Ury. Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In. New York: Penguin Books, 1981.
Floating Eagle Feather (ed.) …And the Earth Lived Happily Ever After: Old and New Traditional Tales to Wage Peace. Metairie, LA: Wages of Peace, 1987.
Fox, John. Poetic Medicine: The Healing Art of Poem-Making. New York: Putnam, 1997. This book uses poetry and commentary from both famous and unknown poets to help readers respond in thoughtful and creative ways to conflict, loss, illness and other experiences. It also features numerous activities, most of which could be adapted to storytelling as well.
Frankel, Ellen. The Classic Tales: 4,000 Years of Jewish Lore. Northvale, NJ: Jason Aronson, Inc., 1989.
Fredericks, Linda. Using Stories to Prevent Violence and Promote Cooperation. Boulder, CO: Colorado School Mediation Projecct. This collection features 10 multicultural tales and related activities that can help teach conflict resolution skills to studeents in K-12.
Gaer, Joseph. The Fables of India. Boston: Little, Brown, 1955.
Ginsburg, Mirra. Three Rolls and One Doughnut: Fables from Russia. Illus. By Anita Lobel. New York: Dial Press, 1970.
___________. Two Greedy Bears. New York: Macmillan, 1976.
Goleman, Daniel. Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ. New York: Bantam Books, 1995.
Grey, Eve. Legends of the South Seas, Book 1. Honolulu: Island Import Company, 1954.
Griegy y Maestas, Jose and Rudolfo A. Anaya. Cuentos: Tales from the Hispanic Southwest. Santa Fe, NM: Museum of New Mexico Press, 1980. A collection of traditional tales from Colorado, New Mexico and Arizona.
Hardendorff, Jeanne. Tricky Peik and Other Picture Tales. Philadelphia: Lippincott,
1967.
Hyde-Chambers, Frederick and Audry. Tibetan Folk Tales. Boston: Shambhala, 1981.
Jacobs, Joseph. Indian Folk and Fairy Tales. New York: Putnam, n.d.
Jagendorf, M.S. Folk Stories of the South. New York: Vanguard Press, 1972
Johnson, David W, Roger T. Johnson and Edyth Johnson Holubec. The New Circles of Learning: Cooperation In the Classroom and School. Alexandria, VA: Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development, 1994.
Kaula, Edna Mason. African Village Folktales. New York: World, 1968.
Kohn, Alfie. Beyond Discipline: From Compliance to Community. Alexandria, VA: Association for Supervision and Curriculum Development, 1996.
__________. The Brighter Side of Human Nature: Altruism and Empathy in Everyday Life. New York: Basic Books, 1990.
__________. No Contest: The Cast Against Competition. Boston, MA: Houghton Mifflin Co., 1986.
Kurtz, Ernest and Katherine Ketchum. The Spirituality of Imperfection: Modern Wisdom from Ancient Classics. New York: Bantam Books, 1992. Through the use of numerous stories drawn from diverse religious and spiritual traditions, this book explores the idea that inner peace can be heightened by an understanding of human frailties and limitations.Kuykendall, Crystal. From Rage to Hope: Strategies for Reclaiming Black and Hispanic Students. Bloomington, IN: National Education Service, 1992.
Langton, Jane. The Fragile Flag. NY: Harper & Row, 1984. A children's crusade to stop missile making.
Lantieri, Linda and Janet Patti. Waging Peace in our Schools. Boston, MA: Beacon Press, 1996.
Law, Norma. "Children and War." Position paper for the Association of Childhood Education International. February 1973. A survey of research on children's attitudes toward war. Inquire from Association for Childhood Educational International, 3615 Wisconsin Ave., N.W., Washington, D.C. 20016.
Livo, Norma J. and Sandra A. Rietz. Storytelling Activities. Littleton, CO: Libraries Unlimited, 1987. A valuable resource that describes the storytelling process and gives numerous examples of stories and activities.
MacDonald, Margaret. Peace Tales: World Folktales to Talk About. Hamden, CT: Linnet Books, 1992. A collection of 34 folktales that deal with the consequences of violence, the need for conflict resolution, and the possibilities of peace.
______________. "Grandfather Bear Is Hungry" in Look Back and See: Lively Tales for Gentle Tellers. NY: H.W. Wilson, 1991. Chipmunk's sharing calms an irate bear.
Maguire, Jack. Creative Storytelling: Choosing, Inventing and Sharing Tales for Children. New York: McGraw-Hill, 1985. This book provides useful information for anyone interested in becoming a storyteller. It includes sources and types of stories, way to gear stories to children of different ages, and techniques for remembering and adapting stories.
Martin, Rafe. The Hungry Tigress. Berkeley, CA: Parallax Press, 1990.
Meier, Deborah. The Power of Their Ideas: Lessons from Central Park East. Boston, MA: Beacon Press, 1995.
Mendler, Allen N. What Do I Do When …?: How to Achieve Discipline with Dignity in the Classroom. Bloomington, IN: National Education Service, 1992.
Messina, Christine. Cinderella and Other Classic Italian Fairy Tales. New York: Outlet Book Company, 1993.
Muhaiyadeen, Bawa. I Love You, My Children: 101 Stories for Children of All Ages. Philadelphia: The Fellowship Press, 1981. Strange and lovely m moral tales for children by a Sufi master of Sri Lanka.Nelson, Jane, Lynn Nott and H. Stephen Glenn. Positive Discipline in the Classroom. Rocklin, CA: Prima Publications, 1993.
Olweus, Dan. Bullying at School: What We Know and What We Can Do. Cambridge, MA: Blackwell, 1993.
Pearce, Joseph Chilton. Evolution's End: Claiming the Potential of Our Inheritance. New York: HarperCollins, 1992. Pearce analyzes the societal practices that he believes have given rise to rampant violence, suicide, and deteriorating social structures. He devotes several chapters to the crucial importance of play and storytelling.
Pijoan, Teresa. La Cuentista: Traditional Tales in Spanish and English. Santa Fe, NM: Red Crane Books, 1994. The author has lovingly collected these New Mexican stories from family members, friends, shopkeepers, priests, and acquaintances. Some of the stories are traditional folktales, while others are personal stories and recollections.
Powers, Mabel. Stories the Iroquois Tell Their Children. New York: American Book Company, 1917.
Ram Dass and Paul Gorman. How Can I Help? Stories and Reflections on Service. New York: Alfred A. Knopf, 1985. A thoughtful and provocative book about the nature of helping. The book contains many stories that address such issues as compassion, suffering, listening, anger, conflict, burnout and healing.
Reed, Gwendolyn. The Talking Beasts: Myths, Fables and Poems of India. New York: Lothrop, Lee and Shepard, 1969.
Remen, Rachel Naomi. Kitchen Table Wisdom. New York: Riverhead Books, 1996. This remarkable collection of personal stories was written by a woman who is a physician, professor of medicine, therapist, and long-term survivor of chronic illness. She recorded these stories to address spiritual issues of suffering, meaning, love, faith, and miracles in the unfolding of life experience.
Reps, Paul. Zen Flesh, Zen Bones: A Collection of Zen and Pre-Zen Writings. Rutland, VT: Charles Tuttle, 1957.
Rosen, Michael. South and North, East and West. MA: Candlewick Press, 1992.
Scholes, Katherine, Illus. By Robert Ingpen. Peace Begins With You. San Francisco: Sierra Club/Little, Brown, 1989. A gentle discussion of the choices that bring about peace, in picture book format.
Serwer-Bernstein, Blanche L. In the Tradition of Moses and Mohammed: Jewish and Arab Folktales. Northvale, NJ: Jason Aronson, Inc., 1994.Shah, Idries. The Exploits of the Incomparable Mullah Nasrudin. New York: Simon and Schuster, 1966.
Sheppard-Jones, Elisabeth. Welsh Legendary Tales. Edinburgh: Thomas Nelson, 1959.
Silverstein, Shel. "Hug 'o War" in Where the Sidewalk Ends. NY: Harper & Row, 1974. A fun poem to speak or act out.
Skinner, Charles. Myths and Legends of Flowers, Trees, Fruits and Plants. Philadelphia: J.B. Lippincott, 1911.
Smith, Alexander McCall. Children of Wax: African Folk Tales. New York: Interlink Books, 1989.
Storytellers for World Change Network (compilers). Weaving Words, Spinning Hope: A Collecction of Stories and Teacher Activities to help Children Explore Issues of Peace, Justice and Social Awareness. Philadelphia: New Society Press, 1991.
Stotter, Ruth. The Storyteller's Calendar: 1991. Stinson Beach, CA: Stotter Press.
Telushkin, Joseph. Words That Hurt, Words That Heal: How To Choose Words Wisely and Well. New York: William Morrow and Company, 1996. The author, a distinguished rabbi and lecturer, uses modern and ancient stories to explain the power of words and the potential of verbal communication to both harm and hear relationships.
Toth, Marian Davies. Tales from Thailand. Rutland, VT: Charles Tuttle, 1971.
Vigil, Angel. The Corn Woman: Stories and Legends of the Hispanic Southwest. Englewood, CO: Libraries Unlimited, 1994. A collection of Hispanic folktales that span 500 years of cultures, from Aztec times to the present.
Uchida, Yoshiko. The Sea of Gold and Other Tales from Japan. New York: Scribner's, 1965.
Untermeyer, Louis. The World's Greatest Stories. New York: M. Evans, 1964.
Williams-Ellis, Annabel. Fairy Tales from the British. New York: Frederick Warne, 1960.
Zarambouka, Sofia. Irene-Peace: Includes a Play/Aristophanes. Washington, D.C.: Tee Loftin, 1979. A picture book based on Aristophanes' play "Peace." Includes a playlet for kids to perform.
Zubizarreta, Rosalma, Harriet Rohmer and David Schector. The Woman Who Outshone the Sun. San Francisco: Children's Book Press, 1991.

6) This isn't the way it is in "Peace Tales." It's more or less the way I've been telling it, with the additions of these last three days. Before that it was a little kids' story, but the age has gone up to 10 and over.
THE SANDPIPER AND THE WHALE
Sandpiper on beach, having a lovely day, eating the fish, basking in the sun. When you're having a lovely day somebody wants to mess it up. Big blue whale comes out of the ocean.
"YO! BIRD! GETCHER LITTLE BIRD LEGS OUTTA DA OCEAN! OCEAN DON'T BELONG TO NO
BIRDS! OCEAN BELONGS TO THE WHALES! SCRAM!"
Sandpiper: "whodoyouthinkyouareyoubigbluebully?
Idon'thavetodowhatyousayyou'renotmymother. Youscram!"
I SAID LEAVE
isaidno
etc.
So the whale calls out the whale army, the sandpiper looks at all the whales and says
oops. okayyouwannaplayroughtoughguy?
and calls out the sandpiper army.
So many whales, so many birds, you can't see the ocean or the land for the backs of them sitting there. Everyone was so angry, something had to happen.
But no one knew what.
Whale gets idea: kill the birds by eating the land. Whales eat, birds fly into air, scared. Look down at those smug, smug whales waiting for them to die, decide to retaliate. Drink the ocean dry.
Whales cough and sputter and lie on the ocean floor. Sandpipers smug in the sky, waiting, see the little fish that sandpipers eat, coughing and choking and dying. Realise if they kill the whales they kill themselves.
Spitspitspit
Now the whales, safe and snug back in their ocean, looked up in the sky, and saw the birds were getting tired. They were flying lower and lower and some of them were beginning to brush the ocean with their wings. The whales watched. They didn't have to do anything, and the birds would die. Everyone waited to see what the whales would do.
SPIT IT OUT SPIT IT OUT!
SPIT SPIT SPIT
The sandpipers came down to land and rested their wings. The whales and the sandpipers never had another war, because they knew, if you try to hurt someone else, the person you hurt is yourself.
But it's exhausting to tell if they get it, for me and for them.
Hope this helps somebody.

7) The win win story is about a Giant who was more than a match. Everything the people of othe village came to fight the giant with he bested them with the same. Then the wise man of the village was nice and kind to the giant, and the giant had to nicer and kinder and they ended the conflict by the giant being nicer and kinder to everyone. It's a really NICE story. Turns out it waswritten under a pen name by Aaron Shepherd. If you need a copy, I have it. It was originally published in a Quaker journal and no one could get permission because no one knew who Aaron Piper was. That in itself is an interesting story. Aaron finally found people wanting to tell the story and came forth.
Response: Yes, I found it online last night doing a google search on folktales +anger and posted it to the list. The pen name he used was Aaron Piper GOS #20 ~ More Than a Match. You are right, it is a nice story. I plan on using this one for sure.
http://www.aaronshep.com/storytelling/GOS20.html

8) Two Hungry Cats - A Fable
Two hungry cats, having stolen some cheese, could not agree how to divide it. So they called in a monkey to decide the case. "Let me see says the monkey with an arch look, "this slice weighs more than the other." With that, he bite off a large piece, in order, as he said, to make them balance. The other scale was now too heavy. This gave the upright judge a fine pretense to take a second mouthful. "Hold! Hold!" cried the two cats, ‘give each of us his share of the rest and we will be content." "If you are content," says the monkey, "justice is not. The law my friends, must have its course.’ So he nibbled first one piece, and then the other. The poor cats, seeing their cheese in a fair way to be eaten up, most humbly begged the judge to give himself no further trouble. "Not so fast, I beseech you, my friends, ‘ says the judge. "We owe justice to ourselves as well as to you. What is left is due to me in right of my office." So saying, he crammed the whole into his mouth, and very gravely dismissed the court.
Moral: This fable teaches us that it is better to bear a slight wrong, rather than to resort to the law for trifles.
(Taken from McGuffey’s Third Reader, c 1836)

9) Hiroko Fujita tells the story of two snakes who wouldn't stop fighting, wouldn't stop biting each others' tails until they ate each other UP. (Parallel to the Calico Cat and the Gingham Dog.) She heard it in childhood from the farmer next door, but I have heard the same plot from Native American tellers of at least two different Nations.

10) How about the story of the two monkeys/ two cats (or various other animals) who were arguing over how to share a biscuit/cake / various other foodstuffs equally. Another wiser animal comes along and helps them by eating up the two halves to make it equal, of course he ends up eating the whole thing. This story has so many variations around the world I've completly lost track of who's in which one!

11) Here are the bare bones of The Blind Man Catches the Bird:
A blind man marries into a family and to get to know his new brother-in-law better, the blind man spends time going hunting with him. The brother-in-law is impressed with the skill of the blind man. He is able to tune into so much in the jungle and gathers information from his other senses that the brother-in-law cannot. They both set traps. The brother-in-law catches a bird, but the blind man catches a rare and beautiful bird. The brother-in-law switches the birds thinking that the man will never know. On the way home, they have a conversation and the brother-in-law asks why men fight or what starts war between people. The blind man answers "By men doing to each other what you have just done to me." The brother-in-law is shamed and admits to his deception. They switch birds and the brother-in-law asks, "How can men heal their contentions?" and the blind man says, "By doing to others what you have just done to me."

12) How about the story of the two monkeys/ two cats (or various other animals) who were arguing over how to share a biscuit/cake / various other foodstuffs equally. Another wiser animal comes along and helps them by eating up the two halves to make it equal, of course he ends up eating the whole thing.
Response: I do this one, found it as a Japanese tale with two cats finding a rice cake and a monkey out does them. I have since changed it to a tortilla with cheese (cheese is mixed up in the corn masa before forming and cooking it). It's a good tale on friendship and working out problems and children and parents love it. At a boy scout group I added that my dad, when he was a Leader, would have one boy cut the food item and the other one chose. His scouts got real good at cutting exact, even pieces of cookies or candy bars.

13) There is a story about The Farmer and the Snake on my website at
http://www.rosethestorylady
that I use in drug awareness programs. Also The Magic Brush. The connection with Magic Brush is that Ma Lien had respect for the Old Chinese gentleman who gave him the brush. He was true to the promise he gave him.

Indian Cinderella (see information on my website) could also tie into respect. The sisters did not respect her. Their actions did not honor their father. The Indian Cinderella respected Strong Wind and his sister--told the truth. She also believed in herself.

There are 2 stories in The Moral of the Story by Bobby & Sherry Norfolk that might work: Vulture Learns the Laws of Nature and Anansi and the Pot of Beans. In Vulture learns the laws of Nature, Vulture ignores the law, breaks the law (which is a lack of respect) and he is punished by rabbit who tricks him. In Anansi and the Pot of Beans (a story from Africa) Anansi's deceit and greed help understand the need for respect.

The Empty Pot by Demi is another possibility. The emperor gives all the children boiled beans. The one who grows the best plant will become the new emperor. All the other children produce fabulous flowers, but our poor hero, who is a gifted gardener, can grow nothing & is embarrassed to stand before the emperor. He is chosen as the only one honest enough to show what was really grown. . .

Come to think of, The Blue Rose (also on my web site) has some elements of respect and honesty in it also.

Think about all aspects of respect--respect for self (stories about self-esteem), respect for others (Cinderella stories fit here) respect for law and nature. Once you do that, you may find that you already know stories that can be used.

14) I have no clue who said this but I love it! "I don't have to attend every argument I'm invited to."

15) I would suggest some of the stories from the "healing" list that Laura Simms and others put together after September 11th. Many of these can be found at :
http://www.laurasimms.com/AidTimeCrisis.html

I like Learn To Write in The Sand -it's about friendship, but I think that involves respect. The message is that one should remember (respect) the good someone does rather than the bad. (And I emphasis afterwards if there is time -that rather than wishing for the students to have friends like Mussa - I hope that they will BE friends like Mussa. Another note is that is a story that is shared by many of the countries in the Middle East.)

16) This reminds me of all the 'I love you more than salt'or 'I love you more than fresh meat loves salt' stories. In some the father who throws out the daughter goes mad like King Lear or dies.

17) I tell "The Princess In The Suit Of Leather" that fits this motif. At least one Czech version ends with the father sending gold across the border for salt but when the salt comes back it turns to gold. In others the father realizes the value of salt and is reconciled with his youngest daughter. I have been told another Czech version where the daughter is taken in by a witch whose cat recognises her goodness. She is given the last salt in the land by the witch. This she distributes to the poor before her father begs to see her. I think there is also a Scots version like this. I have not read these but would love some sources - they sound intriguing!

In our own East Anglian version, 'Cap a rushes', the meat is served at her wedding feast without salt and is spat out by the guests apart from one who cries. This is of course her father.

18) In The Wolf's Eyelashes, the father confesses that he was wrong before he realizes that he is speaking to his daughter - so his regret seems more genuine to me. The girls in the detention center so far have favored this ending - the boys are more into retribution and have had a mixed response. Last time I told it the Asian boys were surprised that the father threw his daughter out. Of course each story is heard through the filter of the listeners expereinces and the personal stories that follow are always interesting. So many of these kids are wrestling with the need for reconciliation but also fear more pain through being too trusting - so they each wish for their own set of wolf's eyelashes.
Added response: How about the Japanese Tales - The Wolf's Eyelash - It is about a girl who's jealous stepmother convinces her merchant husband to throw his daughter out of the house because she will bring them bad luck by giving the good rice to the beggars and saving the old rice for the new years feast. The girl is refused help by all she meets until she wanders into the woods to die and encounters a wolf. The wolf tells the girl he will not eat her because she is a real human being and offers her a few of his eyelashes to help her understand what this means. When the girl awakes, it is morning, the wolf had kept her warm all night out in the snow and now is gone but she is alive and walks through the woods until she comes upon the next village marketplace. She is about to approach a rich looking woman to ask for work but then she remembers the gift - holds the eyelashes before her eye and sees that everyone there is really an animal (and they are all pecking, cawing, screeching, etc. at each other). Finally she sees a man who stays a "human being" and she follows to him to his hut at the end of the woods. She knocks on the door and just pours out her story - but he has her sitting beside a fire and eating before she can finish. He offers her a room to sleep in and she offers to help him as best she can. She discovers that the spring behind the house bubbles up the finest wine and convinces the woodsman that together they could build an inn. They succeed in this business and also begin to build a life together and in time are married. One day a beggar comes to the door and she invites him in to get warm by the fire. The old man begins to cry and says he is not worthy because "Once I had a daughter as kind as you and I threw her out and my life has been in ruins ever since. It is of course her father who she embraces and tells him the story of the Wolf's eyelash. The old man lives on with his daughter and each night he tells this same tale to his grandchildren and the travelers at the inn.

I tell this story at the Juvenile Detention Center and it has opened up so many possible avenues of discussion with the teens there - especially the girls. There is a copy of this in Susan Strauss' book - Wolf Stories, Myths and True Life Tales From Around The World, Beyond Words Publishing, Hillsboro OR, 1993.

19) Nassreddin Prayer: when asked what he prays about his response was; when I was young I asked Allah to give me strength to change the world. As I became older and had a family I prayed asking Allah to give me the strenght to change my family. Now that I am an old man I pray to Allah asking for strength to change myself.

Children of Wax, from Children of Wax by Alexander McCall Smith, many other great stories in this book.

The boy who drew cats:The Boy Who Drew Cats - A Tale of Japan. This Japanese tale is retold from Gleanings from Buddha-Fields, by Lafcadio Hearn, Houghton Mifflin, Boston, 1897. Joji is pronounced "JO-jee." The temples and priests in the story are Buddhist. My thanks to storyteller Grace Megumi Fleming for her suggestions and help with cultural details.

20) The Wolves Within
A grandson told of his anger at a schoolmate who had done him an injustice. Grandfather said: "Let me tell you a story." "I, too, have felt a great hate for those that have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do. But, hate wears you down and does not hurt your enemy. It is like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times. It is as if there are two wolves inside me: one is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way. But the other wolf is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of temper. He fights with everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of then try to dominate my spirit." The boy looked intently into his grandfather's eyes and asked, "Which one wins, Grandfather?" The grandfather solemnly replied, "The one I feed."

21) One day after school I stopped to deal with a boy who was throwing rocks at passing cars -- I didn't want to drive my car past him; so I figured I might as well deal with the problem. He was actually a good little guy (he could have run away from me easily). He guided me to his school's office, where I turned him over to the office secretary. On the way, we talked about how he wouldn't like rocks thrown at his new bike, and that my job as an adult was to help kids see right and wrong so they grow up responsible. He also corrected my terminology -- so that I correctly reported that he had been throwing PEBBLES at cars.

22) A Walk in the Forest
Little Red Riding Hood is skipping down the road when she sees a big bad wolf crouched down behind a log. "My, what big eyes you have, Mr. Wolf." The wolf jumps up and runs away. Further down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this time he is crouched behind a bush. "My what big ears you have, Mr. Wolf." Again the wolf jumps up and runs away.About two miles down the road Little Red Riding Hood sees the wolf again and this time he is crouched down behind a rock. "My what big teeth you have, Mr.Wolf." With that the wolf jumps up and screams,
"WILL YOU GO AWAY !
I'M TRYING TO POOP !!!!"

23) A story tells that two friends were walking through the desert. At a specific point of the journey, they had an argument, and one friend slapped the other one in the face. The one, who got slapped, was hurt, but without anything to say, he wrote in the sand: "TODAY, MY BEST FRIEND SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE." They kept on walking, until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath. The one who got slapped and hurt started drowning, and the other friend saved him. When he recovered from the fright, he wrote on a stone: "TODAY MY BEST FRIEND SAVED MY LIFE." The friend who saved and slapped his best friend, asked him, "Why, after I hurt you, you wrote in the sand, and now you write on a stone?" The other friend, smiling, replied: "When a friend hurts us, we should write it down in the sand, where the winds of forgiveness get in charge of erasing it away, and when something great happens, we should engrave it in the stone of the memory of the heart, where no wind can erase it"
--Author Unknown

24) Do not meddle in the affairs of Dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

25) WHEN THE WORLD SAYS, "NO!"
When Henry Ward Beecher was a young boy in school, he learned a lesson in self-confidence, which he never forgot. He was called upon to recite in front of the class. He had hardly begun when the teacher interrupted with an emphatic, "No!" He started over and again the teacher thundered, "No!" Humiliated, Henry sat down. The next boy rose to recite and had just begun when the teacher shouted, "No!" This student, however, kept on with the recitation until he completed it. As he sat down, the teacher responded, "Very good!" Henry was irritated. "I recited just as he did," he complained to the teacher. But the instructor replied, "It is not enough to know your lesson, you must be sure. When you allowed me to stop you, it meant that you were uncertain. If all the world says, 'No!' it is your business to say, 'Yes!' and prove it." The world says, "No!" in a thousand ways: "No! You can't do that." "No! You are wrong." "No! You are too old." "No! You are too young." "No! You are too weak." "No! It will never work." "No! You don't have the education." "No! You don't have the background." "No! You don't have the money." "No! It can't be done." And each "No!" you hear has the potential to erode your confidence bit by bit until you quit altogether. Though the world says, "No!" to you today, will you determine to say, "Yes!" and prove it?
From "One Minute Can Change a Life" by Steve Goodier

26) "Grandmother's Table" from the Brothers Grimm
Once there was a feeble old woman whose husband died and left her all along, so she went to live with her son and his wife and their own little daughter. Every day the old woman's sight dimmed and her hearing grew worse,k and sometimes at dinner her hands trembled so badly that the peas rolled off her spoon or the soup ran from her cup. The son and his wife could not help but be annoyed at the way she spilled her meal all over the table. One day, after she knocked over a glass of milk, they told each other that enough was enough. They set up a small table for her in the corner next to the broom closet and made the old woman eat her meals there. She sat all alone, looking with tear-filled eyes across the room at the others. Sometimes they spoke to her while they ate, but usually it was to scold her for dropping a spoon or a fork. One evening, just before dinner, the little girl was busy playing on the floor with her building blocks. Her father asked her what she was making. "I'm building a little table for you and mother," she said, smiling, "so you can eat by yourselves in the corner when I get big." Her parents sat staring at her for some time, and then suddenly both began to cry. That nignt, they led the old woman back to her place at the big table. From then on, she ate with the rest of the family, and her son and his wife never seemed to mind a bit when she spilled something every now and then.

27) In "Peace Tales" (Margaret Read MacDonald) there's a Welsh story about a couple who show consideration for the little people --and choose to find a new location for throwing out their slops, to avoid a little people's village. It's called Slops.

28) The Gift of Insults
There once lived a great warrior. Though quite old, he still was able to defeat any challenger. His reputation extended far and wide throughout the land and many students gathered to study under him. One day an infamous young warrior arrived at the village. He was determined to be the first man to defeat the great master. Along with his strength, he had an uncanny ability to spot and exploit any weakness in an opponent. He would wait for his opponent to make the first move, thus revealing a weakness, and then would strike with merciless force and lightning speed. No one had ever lasted with him in a match beyond the first move. Much against the advice of his concerned students, the old master gladly accepted the young warrior's challenge. As the two squared off for battle, the young warrior began to hurl insults at the old master. He threw dirt and spit in his face. For hours he verbally assaulted him with every curse and insult known to mankind. But the old warrior merely stood there motionless and calm. Finally, the young warrior exhausted himself. Knowing he was defeated, he left feeling shamed. Somewhat disappointed that he did not fight the insolent youth, the students gathered around the old master and questioned him. "How could you endure such an indignity? How did you drive him away?" "If someone comes to give you a gift and you do not receive it," the master replied, "to whom does the gift belong?"

29) Shop, eat chocolate, go places with people who love you, get all the hugs you can manage, hold babies, etc. Whatever works for you. And when those unwanted and undeserved feelings and thoughts that put you lower than a snake's belly come slithering in, do a Julie Andrews and think of your favorite things. I went shopping today and bought a jacket that would look great on you.

30) "First they came for the Muslims, but I was not a Muslim so I did not speak out. Then they came for the Arabs and the people of Middle Eastern descent, but I was neither, so I did not speak out. Then they came for the globalization protesters, but I was not a globalization protester so I did not speak out. And when they came for me, there was no one left to speak out for me."

31) Dog and Leopard A wealthy man decided to go on a safari in Africa. He took his faithful pet dog along for company. One day, the dog starts chasing a butterflies and before long discovers that he is lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in the direction with the obvious intention of having lunch. The dog thinks, "Boy, I'm in deep trouble now" (He was an Irish setter.) Then he noticed some bones on the ground close by and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap, the dog exclaims loudly, "Man, that was one delicious leopard. I wonder if there are any more around here?" Hearing this, the leopard halts his attack in midstride, a look of terror comes over him, and slinks away into the trees. "Whew," says the leopard. "That was close! That dog nearly had me." Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So, off he goes. But the dog saw him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figured that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans, and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The cat is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving canine." Now the dog sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back, and thinks, "What am I going to do now?" But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to the attackers, pretending he hasn't seen them yet. Just when they get close enough to hear, the dogs says, "Where's that monkey? I just can never trust him.. I sent him off half an hour ago to bring me another leopard, and he's still not back!"

32) There is a similar story about a young cat and a young rat in Malachi McCormick's book "Cat Tales". He says it's an Afro/Caribbean story. The gist of it is that a young rat and a kitten play together until their parents tell them they are supposed to be enemies. In his version, the kitten wishes the parents hadn't told them, and the little rat wonders what would have happened if they hadn't.

33) "We are told that in the Babemba tribe of South Africa, when a person acts irresponsibly or unjustly, he/she is taken to the center of the village. All work ceases and every man, woman and child in the village gathers in a large circle around the accused. Then the tribe bombards the rejected person with affirmations! One at a time, friends and family enumerate all the good the individual has done. Every incident, every experience that can be recalled with some detail and accuracy is recounted.
ll their positive attributes, strengths and kindnesses are recited carefully and at length. Finally, the tribal circle is broken, a joyous celebration takes place, and the outcast is welcomed back into the tribe."

What a beautiful ritual of restoration! They replace hurt with happiness; pain with peace. Once again they are family. The rejected one is restored and the village is made whole.

Paul Boese has said, "Forgiveness does not change the past, but it does enlarge the future."

34) I love midrash, so I'd recommend Rabbi Marc Gellman's 2 books: Does God Have a Big Toe; Stories about Stories in the Bible & God's Mailbox; More Stories about Stories in the Bible. At the same time I've found Walter Wangerin, Jr.'s The Book of God; the Bible as a Novel useful in constructing a Biblical story.

Love the work of Margaret McBride Smith & Corinne Stavish (listed alphabetically to avoid deciding who gets top billing there) & have enjoyed seeing them in both workshops & performance on their look at Biblical telling. I believe they have audio recordings on this (I tend to avoid recordings lest I mimic the performance unconsciously, but on this I might yet weaken) & am sending them a bcc of this in the hopes they decide to put their Biblical work into an anthology. Their research & creativity deserves such preservation!
Response: Actually it is Barbara McBride Smith not Margaret. Corrine and Barbara do amazing and intelligent biblical story work. Corrine from the Jewish perspective and Barbara the Christian. Perhaps the best thing about their work is their bravery, scholarship and focus on making sure the work is good story. I would also recommend the series "The storytellers Companion to the Bible" It is a great Christian series. I think there are 10 or 12 volumes. In fact each volume has stories from tellers that either reflect or parallel the text. The one on women of the bible has stories from Barbara, and Elizabeth Ellis. It is good story work.
Barbara's husband is a nationally respected NT scholar and editor of many of the series--Dennis Smith. (Eventually the one I have stories in will be out on the stories of Jesus.) Each one is focused on either a Book of the Bible or group like "women."

35) I found this site while researching. I thought some of you might find it useful.
Click here: Kofi Annan - Center of the Storm. Classroom. Lesson Plan | PBS
http://www.pbs.org/wnet/un/classroom/lesson1.html

36) Several years ago, the much-missed Allan Davies posted hsi story The Secret Heart of the Tree. The story is now published on Bobby Norfolk's Moral of the Story. We have used it successfully with this age group.
Carol C. 4/15/06
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37) What about a version of "The Kit Kat Bar"?
Mary K.C. 4/15/06
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(This web page updated 5/11/04; 4/16/06)